“Things turn out best for the people that make the best of the way things turn out.” – Anonymous
To repeat, here are four brief steps to replace destructive thoughts with constructive ones in order to control your mind:
- Recognize the destructive thought.
- Stop and RESET the destructive thought!
- Replace the destructive thought with a constructive thought.
- Reward/Enjoy gaining control of your mind!
Step 1 – Recognize the destructive thought.
You have to first recognize when you have a destructive thought. We have so many thoughts during the day, most of them originating in our subconscious minds, that it’s nearly impossible to notice them all. But it’s imperative for you to be able to pinpoint them when they occur. Examples might sound something like:
I really stink at this.
I can’t do this.
That scares the #$&@ out of me!
These destructive thoughts are all based on fear or worry, rather than possibility. They block you from achieving what you’re capable of.
Three ways to recognize your destructive thoughts.
- Hear them. You can hear destructive thoughts going through your mind when you’re paying attention to what you are thinking.
- Feel them. How do you feel a destructive thought? The truth is you can’t feel it directly, but you can notice it by feeling the physical reaction it creates – tension in your shoulders, shallow breathing in your chest, tension in your stomach.
- See them. How can you see a thought? Well, you can’t. But what you can see is you not taking action or procrastinating. What is your inaction telling you? Most likely, it’s saying that you’re scared.
Fear isn’t necessarily bad. It’s a warning. When you finally become conscious of your own fear, you will be empowered to deal with it. You have to ask yourself, am I the master or the victim of my own thinking?
When you gain control of your thoughts, you gain control of your emotions. And everybody wants more control of their emotions.
Try this thought replacement exercise
List the four steps to replace negative, destructive thoughts with constructive thoughts:
- Recognize a __________ thought.
- Stop and RESET the ____________________!
- Replace the destructive thought with a __________ thought.
- Reward/enjoy gaining control of your __________!
Write a replacement thought that is
- related to the thought you are replacing
- in your control
You get what you focus on! Your focus must be on what you do want not on what you don’t want, or you’ll attract a pile of crap!
This thought replacement technique gives you control of your own mind. When you have developed your master observer-self and have better control of your thoughts, you’ll notice that you stop having strong emotional reactions to what others say.
How did you do? Are you able to replace negative thoughts with positive ones?
Thanks for sharing.
For questions about this post or for information on becoming a fearless leader, contact Dr. Cathy Greenberg and The Fearless Leader Group at (888) 320-1299 or by email at firstname.lastname@example.org.